My Three Pet Peeves in a Relationship
It’s been a little while hasn’t it? At least its felt that way to me. I haven’t been feeling the best. You know it’s been flu season and it eventually caught up to me. Now today I’ll be speaking on my biggest pet peeves in relationships and dating.
Everyone has things they don’t like in a relationship. Then there are things people hate in a relationship. These things are like nails on a chalkboard. You may hate the way your partner eats, the way they laugh, you may even begin to hate their voice after they have nagged you the 100th time today.
Me personally I don’t have many dating pet peeves but the little ones I do have does drive me crazy. Some of them are just normal pet peeves but we all know when are partner does things the annoyance just gets amplified by 1000. So without further ado here are my pet peeves in relationships.
Lateness
Late people grind my gears. I hate when my friends are late to something. I hate when co workers are late to work. Hell I hate myself when someone or something causes me to be late. But nothing makes me angrier when my partner or someone I’m dating is late. I feel it’s the ultimate betrayal. The ultimate stab in the back. And at the same time I completely understand it. With guys we wash up. Find a nice outfit out of the closet. Spray some cologne chew some gum and we are out the door. With women its a whole different process. Trying on multiple outfits different shoes. Talking to yourselves. “Should I wear flats or heels? Bag or no bag?” Putting on make up perfume and whatever else you all do in the bathroom. You all put time in effort into your appearance.
However I’m still going to be angry because we agreed on a time and that time wasn’t honored. As I sit in the restaurant waiting for her to show my drink already ordered as I’m rereading her text that says “Omw babe” that was sent 15 mins ago. I’m sitting there angry thinking about how petty I’m going be when she gets here. Thinking about what her long drawn out excuse is going be this time. Maybe she got caught in traffic. Couldn’t find her keys. Lost track of time. Whatever the excuse I know it’s just going make me more angry. But of course once she gets there and I see her beautiful outfit that I know she put hell of a lot of effort into putting together. Once I smell her fragrance and look into her eyes as she says “so sorry babe I *Insert generic excuse*” I instantly forgive her…(sigh)
Not speaking up when there is a problem
I’ve had ex’s in past who were extremely vocal people. Also very talkative social people….until there was a problem in the relationship. Then I had to figure out what was wrong because all of a sudden they would go mute on me. I’m not a mind reader and I don’t like assuming things. Things would be easier if I knew what the problem is. But with some people they expect you to know what the problem is and because of that they won’t tell you. They want you to figure it out the hard way. They want you to…..suffer. You have to guess what the problem is to the point where you’re thinking back to old conversations. Looking back at old text messages between you to. Trying to figure out what you could have possibly did wrong. Then when you ask you don’t get a clear answer. The response you get is basically them telling you that you should already know what you did.
“You don’t give me the attention I need from you. Instead you go play basketball with your friends but I wont tell you that when you ask “what’s wrong.” I’d rather give you very subtle hints until you figure it out yourself.” It drives me crazy because I can’t solve a problem if I don’t know exactly what it is and by the time I figure it out either the problem is much bigger or it’s too late. I feel as though if things are said as soon as the problem starts it could be solved a lot easier. Of course there is more than one reason things aren’t said. Your partner may not want to hurt your feelings. They might not feel like you are ready to hear what they have to say. Or they may not want to come across as a giant nag. I get it, I totally do but I feel as though communication is very important. I also think it’s such a pet peeve to me because not only am I a very blunt person at times. I’ve grew up in a family that’s arguably more blunt than myself. So if there is an issue whether it’s friends or a relationship I’ll typically tell the person when it happens before it becomes a bigger problem and as a result I sometimes to a fault expect that from the other person.
Putting everything on social media
Eventually I’m going write a book on social media effects on relationships so this last pet peeve is very valid. Okay, I just told you that one of my pet peeves is my partner not speaking up when there is an issue in a relationship. What really drives me ballistic is when i have figure out what I did via social media. Or someone texting me “what’s going on with you and your girlfriend? I seen something on Facebook.” Then you log on and see something subtle like “I’m done” or “I hate when he does X, Y and Z” It just causes so many problems. For one your problems are out in the open for every to see. A private issue can quickly become a not so private issue with people commenting, asking questions and while all this is happening. You can be oblivious to what’s going on. Asking your partner what’s wrong while they tell you it’s nothing yet unknowingly to you. Social media is buzzing. It’s something that happens a lot in young couples and it just really grind my gears.
Honorable Mentions
I have other little relationship pet peeves I wont go into depth but I’ll list a few.
- When they snore
- When they sleep with the lights on
- When they vent your relationship problems to their girlfriends after a argument
- when she eats like super neat when you go out to eat. “Girl stop playing use your hands”
- When they leave clothes everywhere
In conclusion
Everyone has their pet peeves in a relationship. Some much crazier and irrational than others. When dating it’s usually one of top questions when meeting someone new. I’d like to know what offends that person rather than figuring it out the hard way. So I ask anyone who is reading. What is your biggest pet peeve when it comes to a relationship or dating. Comment below. Like, Share, and Subscribe and remember “love is confusing but we’ll get through it together. “