You don’t HAVE to be in a relationship. I’ll say it one more time. You don’t HAVE to be in a relationship! This may sound a little weird if not bizarre coming from the guy that specializes in all things relationships. But I think it’s the truth. So many people feel as though it validates them to be with someone. I speak to so many single people out here and I just feel as though it’s so much of an urge for them to be dating someone, or be on the cuffs of having a relationship with another person.
Now obviously I’m not saying that people shouldn’t want a relationship or be single forever however, I feel as though society puts so much pressure on people being in relationships that people just hop in them for all the wrong reasons.
Our Fascination with relationships.
We are so fascinated by relationships. We are worried about which celebrity is dating who. Hell Jay Z and Beyonce has made millions over these past years because we are so heavily invested in their relationship. We lurk on Social Media to see who our friends are talking to. They change their relationship status and we are the first to comment “what happened”. Wanting to know every detail.
You can’t really watch one show or movie without the main protagonist being in a relationship or having a love interest. Even if they have to force that little sub-plot in there somehow. They do it because that’s what we are interested in.
It’s almost seen in a negative light to be single. Like it’s a bad thing. I almost feel as though when someone is single we kind of subconsciously see them as “damaged goods.” Cause let’s be honest everyone seems a hell of a lot more “attractive” when they are with someone. But if they are single it’s a little different.
Even if the woman is really attractive and a great person as a guy you’re thinking ok why is she single something must be wrong. And I’m sure the same goes for women when they see a great single guy. Even though you all probably assume that guy is single because he wants to be a whore or something.
Sex
But that’s another thing also, Sex.
Remember when I said people jump into relationships for the wrong reasons. Well this is one of the biggest reasons. People get bashed heavily for having sex outside of a relationship. It’s seen as dirty. Especially if a woman is doing it. It doesn’t take too long until she starts getting a reputation as a flirt or a whore. Alot of people may not agree with me on this but, I believe if you’re single when it comes to sex.
Male or female you can do what you want as long you protect yourself and not messing with someone that is in a relationship. But back to my point. People love sex but don’t want to be bashed for it so it’s one if the reasons why people hop into relationships.
Everyone isn’t ready for commitment
Everyone just isn’t ready to be in a relationship. I always say a relationship is like a second job. There is so much effort you have to put in it. Everyone isn’t mentally ready to be in one and to be honest most people aren’t even mature enough to be in one. A “serious” relationship isn’t about one person. Your actions. affects the other person and vice versa. It takes two people being in synch with one another.
And quite frankly every person on the planet may not be able to handle something like that at this juncture in their lives. And people like this gets pressured by society and hops into a relationship and because they weren’t ready. They wind up hurting the other person because they weren’t all the way invested.
Validation
I also said earlier that people needs validation. Being in a relationship validates them. When they are single they feel like they have a void in their life. They don’t feel complete. Sometimes it’s even an image thing. They need to be looked at a certain way. A relationship becomes their identity. They need someone to be hugged up with in pictures or videos. They need to have their “bae”.
This is usually the people that hops in and out of relationships. Every month the relationship status changes and they are cuddled up with someone new. Some people want validation because they assume thats what validates everyone else. They are constantly the third or fifth wheel on dates and everytime they turn around and see a happy couple and may think thats what they are missing to acheive their happiness.
In conclusion
Again I’m not saying that wanting to be in a relationship is bad or that you should stay single. I’m saying don’t just hop into a relationship just for self validation or because of pressure. Even if the pressure is coming from the person that may want to be with you. Being single isn’t a bad thing either.
It may give you time to get your life or head together so that when you feel as though the time is right you can be in a meaningful and fulfilling relationship..Orrr you can just be single and not have to deal with your girlfriend stealing fries off your plate after she finished her meal…..The choice is yours and that’s my whole entire point. You have a choice you don’t HAVE to be in a relationship. Like, Share, and Subscribe and remember. “Love is confusing but we’ll get through it together.” And happy early FORTH OF JULY!!!!