Why being “In Love” isn’t always a good thing
“So, what really is this thing called love? Well, in my opinion, it’s this thing that turns you into some happy-go-lucky idiot. Like seriously, it separates you from logic and common sense and turns you into someone you didn’t know was there.” That was a quote from my first ever post “Love.” Since that day I’ve grown and matured and I realized something. It’s not Love that’s dangerous. Love is a great thing.
Everyone should love. Whether it’s the love you have for your dog or cat. The love you have for your family or even a more intimate love that you may have for your partner. However too much of anything can easily become a bad thing. Too much of a good feeling can become an addiction. Which leads me to my point on why being in love isn’t always a good thing.
Being In Love Is An Addiction…..
Love is one thing but what happens when you fall in love with someone. Hell what happens when you fall in love with anything? You can’t get enough of it. It’s the first thing you think about and last thing you think about everyday.
I used to think that being in Love was the next step from actually Loving someone. I thought it was levels to this. You like them, you love them, and then you fall in love with them, “The End”. But I’ve realized that being “In Love”. Is actually something completely different than liking and Loving someone. It’s in its own category.
Though it may share the same name as Love it’s just a mask for what it truly is…..an addiction. No different then any drug. No different than that cigarette you have to smoke on that lunch break. No different than any show you’ve binged watched in one day. You almost can’t function without it. Unlike most addictions however being in Love is usually looked at as a positive.
It’s almost essential considering that we are all looking for someone to fall in Love with and be married. That’s our end goal. Unless your hearts been broken you usually don’t look at it as a bad thing. You want to fall in love with someone and them fall in love with you.
The Danger Of Being In Love
Being in Love with a person is also one of the most powerful addictions. When you’re addicted to something like an object or a thing. For example if you’re in love with shopping as long as you have the money it’s nothing that can stop you from fulfilling that addiction. If you’re in love with cheesecake you are going to get your cheesecake. However when you are in love with a person that person can reject you.
And sometimes when you are addicted to something or someone and can’t get it. It only makes you want it much more. Which can lead to very dangerous scenerios if you can get it. You may harm the person you may even harm yourself you may hurt people close to you. Also another sign of an addiction is you may not even know that you are hurting anyone. You become oblivious.
I’ve had someone close to me. Who was in an abusive relationship. She had one of those controlling type men. They got into fights. He would leave bruises even beat her kids. They would break up for bit but she would always come back. So when she broke down to me and told me everything that was going on I asked her “Why do you keep going back, why do you keep putting yourself in this situation?”
And she replied “He’s the only man I’ve ever fell in Love with. Everytime I leave. Something just drags me backs.” Now this is years ago. She’s doing great now but at the time she was so addicted or in Love with this guy. That she couldn’t see the damage she was causing to herself and people around her and even once she did she didn’t have the strength or the will power to get free.
When You’re Both In Love…
Now when it comes to two people in love with eachother it’s not always a bad thing. I’ve seen people married in love live happily and die happily together. However it can also be a very toxic situation. When you love something or someone. You love them dispite their flaws. Not only that. You also understand their flaws.
You may love burgers and french fries but you understand that too much will affect your health and add to your waistline. When you’re in love with something you ignore the flaws and fail to understand them. You don’t care if fries and burgers aren’t good for you. You just have to have it everyday.
That’s what leads to toxic relationships. What happens when you have two people together that ignore each others flaws? Then they may not comprehend the fact that they may not be right for each other. Then it eventually leads to relationships where either they think they are happy or they know they aren’t but still can’t break up from each other. Trust me you ignore alot of BS when you are in love with someone.
And usually when or if the addiction ends that’s when you start really seeing them for who they really are because you have ignored it for so long you forget their bad traits were even there.
In conclusion, I’m not saying relationships are bad or love is bad but too much of anything becomes a bad thing. It’s very easy to lose yourself and extremely hard to even realize that you’ve lost yourself. Anything can become an addiction even the person laying next to you every night. Like, Share, and Subcribe and remember “Love is confusing but we’ll get through this together.”